Loving yourself should be easy.

This is why you are struggling.

Self-love is a commitment. Not a temporal emotion.

Loving yourself seems to be such a hard concept to grasp.

And it has been something that frustrated me for a long time because of how few examples I have had of people who love and respect themselves deeply.

If we look at what we can find on social media, self-love looks like taking a nice bath with a facemask and some wine, a fancy yoga class, or a spa day.

These experiences can certainly make you feel better about yourself because you decide to dedicate some special time to your well-being, but loving yourself is way deeper than that.

In this letter, I will not only help you understand that self-love is something that should happen naturally and effortlessly, but you will also gain access to the 5 changes I’ve made to my life that help me grow a deep sense of love and respect for myself.

Don’t change or add – detach instead.

No one was born hating, doubting or fearing themselves. It is a mechanism we all learned from our environment as we grew up.

• These negative voices you have in your head
• The shame you feel when you make a mistake
• The pressure you put on yourself to perform perfectly

It doesn’t belong to you.

It comes from the expectations, the selfish needs and the fear your parents, school and society have put on you.

You don’t have to:

• Do better
• Try harder
• Constantly change yourself

To meet the standard or expectations the world has of you. You are not on this planet, living this precious human experience as the exceptional person you are, to live for the world.

You are here to live for yourself, and it is about time to start treating yourself as such, by finally choosing yourself.

A huge part of your journey to growing love and respect for yourself is about unlearning and detaching from the distorted beliefs, experiences and truths your environment has tried to convince you of and conditioned into.

Before we keep going:

My new Self-Love Course CHOOSING ME is officially open for enrollment on August 1^st.

I am opening Pre-Sale next Sunday to 6 students who will benefit from a 45-minute call with me before the beginning of the course in September.

If you want to learn exactly how to heal your relationship with yourself and nurture a deep level of self-love and self-respect to give yourself the life you truly deserve, then I invite you to pre-register here and secure your spot as soon as Pre-sale opens next Sunday.

The deeper the love, the bigger the power

We are at a special time in history.

A place of abundance and infinite opportunities that allows people who recognize their personal power to access that abundance and explore the endless opportunities life is full of.

And honestly, why would you not want to?

To do this, I want you to start stepping into your personal power. I have a full letter dedicated to the controversial topic of Power that you can read here or a Podcast episode that you can find here.

Stepping into your power is simultaneously an act of love towards the past, present and future versions of yourself. (Doesn’t this already sound so powerful?)

Recognizing the power that lies within you naturally will

• Create healing for the past versions of you
• Deepen the love you hold for your present self
• Allow you to make the best decisions for your future self

Here are 5 aspects I want you to make your main priority in life that will help you cultivate and nurture a deeper level of love and respect for yourself.

1. Make your physical health your main priority

You depend on your body and your body is dependent on you for the rest of your life.

You both have a relationship together and want to make decisions according to each other’s best interests.

By making your physical health your main priority, you are saying to your body :

“I commit to treating you well and to love and respect you better”

The moment you make that commitment, I want you to filter all of your decisions and actions through this new standard you have now set for you and your body.

This is how every movement practice, every good night of sleep or food you put in your body becomes a way of saying “I love you” to the most important companion of your life (your body ♡)

2. Stop lying (to yourself and others)

It takes a lot of courage to become an honest person. It requires you to choose to be uncomfortable with reality instead of bending reality to protect your ego or your emotions.

When you start to commit to the truth and make honesty one of your values, you ground yourself into reality, which is the only place where change can actually happen.

It also becomes a way of showing yourself that the real version of yourself matters more than the temporary emotions of discomfort you are going to feel when you first start to sit with how things truly are.

3. Spend (a lot) of time alone

Most people fear being by themselves. Instead, they hold on to superficial relationships to avoid sitting with everything they are.

You cannot expect the world to love you for who you are if you aren’t able to be comfortable with all the parts, the emotions and the story that make up the current version of you.

You need to find the courage to sit with these initial moments of deep discomfort. I can promise you that once you spend these first couple of (very) uncomfortable moments alone, you will access a level of security within yourself that will mark the beginning of the acknowledgment of your own personal power.

4. Self-educate everyday

To create better for yourself and your life, you need to become a better human.

You can only become a better human if you keep learning and growing.

Most of us probably associate learning with school, and unfortunately stopped learning, as we stopped going to school.

That is why a lot of people don’t evolve and grow, but stagnate or regress instead.

Curiosity is not only innate, it’s also a huge source of joy, excitement and passion. If you dare to open your mind and heart up to the infinite world of knowledge, we all have instant access to.

Books, documentaries, podcasts, events, people, expositions, online courses, workshops, everything can become a teacher to the ones who understand that life is about growth and expansion in the first place.

5. Stay away from people, places and situations that disrupt your inner peace

With these 4 points, you can clearly see that we have some work to do.

Time, energy and attention you won’t be able to pour into yourself if you allow people, places and situations to drain and have a negative impact on you.

Start to be mindful of the conversations you are having, the way you feel after sharing your time with certain people and the message behind people’s actions.

If you observe that these people, places or situations bring you down instead of elevating you, it is time to distance yourself from them.

This will not only create a lot of mental and emotional space inside of you, it is also an act of self-respect to distance yourself from what isn’t serving the person you want to become.

As you choose yourself through small and big decisions, you are constantly showing yourself that you are worth being chosen and respected.

The confidence coming out from constantly showing up for yourself will make building a life around love and respect for yourself easier and easier.

As your mental, physical, emotional, spiritual health and overall life will only get better and better.

I will see you in next week’s letter,

Until then, take care.

Oli