“A healthy man wants a thousand things, a sick man only wants one.”

Confucius

I spent most of my life working in the fitness industry.

After spending quite some time observing, questioning and reflecting on the different health and sports environments I have been exposed to, I had to come to a sad conclusion:

The industries that are the biggest in promoting health, are actually the sickest.

Surface level health as the societal ideal

If you have any kind of social media, then you are constantly exposed to people showing off their perfect bodies.

Men with perfectly chiseled abs, huge backs and beautiful round shoulders.

Women with big bums, ridiculously tiny waists making cute, innocent faces.

I myself have been heavily influenced by this constant exposure to the ideal body and almost completely destroyed my body and my health for an ideal that only exists online.

One of my motivations for moving my body and training hard was to look like all of those beautiful fitness girls you can find on Instagram.

It is quite easy to understand why:

Everyone wants to feel pretty, liked and validated.

But this becomes a problem when our physical appearance or physical performance becomes the main criteria which we build our personal worth, self-love and happiness around.

This is also a problem because we now take abs, tiny waists or 50k runs per week as a reference for what is healthy and what is not.

If you are new to the fitness industry, the exposure you get from social media will easily lead you down the rabbit hole of quick fat-loss diets, 4-week flat stomach workouts and ultimate booty guides.

The constant social media exposure to perfect physics and exceptional performances acts as a mirror.

But since all these platforms are not anchored in the real world, the reflection you get about yourself will be distorted:

• It will reflect what is natural and normal about our bodies as imperfect.
• It will highlight and exacerbate the parts you already struggle with.
• It will make your small progress and weekly accomplishments completely meaningless.

Without realising, you enter a vicious circle of constantly comparing yourself, never feeling good enough and thinking you are unworthy of love, care and acceptance because of the way you look or the way you perform.

I don’t think we realise the amount of pressure we unconsciously take on through our exposure to an online world dedicated to perfection, endless happiness and constant success.

You might know it, but it’s always good to be reminded:

Social media is not the real world.

But the person reading these lines (you) lives in the real world.

How fair and right is it then, to compare yourself to versions of other people that only exist on your phone?

Also, now that you have learned to observe the world around you (read my second letter here if you don’t know what I am talking about) :

• How many of these perfect bodies do you see?
• How happy are the people you interact with daily?
• How often do you meet someone whose level of performance matches what you see online?

This should give you an indication that the people you see on your phone are rare (sometimes liars too), but it is also an invitation to let go of some of that pressure and high expectations, because what you are comparing yourself to does not exist in the real world.

Sick + disconnected - our current health standard

In my third letter, I spoke about how much I used to abuse my body physically because of mental and emotional pain I didn’t know and hadn’t learned how to process.

Through my career as a personal trainer and looking at society at large, I realised that because most of us use different addictions to cope with life, we find ourselves in a position where we constantly reject being in our bodies.

This results in a state of disconnect from the physical changes, fluctuations and signals our body uses to communicate with us every day.

It also doesn’t allow you to feel, express, process and understand your emotions fully.

Learning to be in and connect to your body is the only way to achieve optimal physical health.

Learning to feel and understand your emotions is the only way to achieve optimal mental health.

Your body, your mind + your emotions constitute the first two pillars of the Modern Health Course, and I am now opening 10 spots for the first Cohort that will start next month.

We are all physical beings.

The purpose of having a body in the first place is to live and be anchored in this body.

This means that you want to open yourself up to everything your physical expression has to offer, instead of running away from it.

The longer you keep avoiding settling into your body, the sicker you will get.

Because you are not able to hear when your body is tired.

Because you don’t know how to relax when your body or your mind is stressed.

Because you will keep working out when your body is in pain.

Because you don’t know how to release your sadness, anger and frustrations without porn, cigarettes, alcohol, coffee, Netflix, games or any other addictions.

Another thing you need to become aware of is that the only thing that will go through life with you, is your body.

You need your body to live.

Why should anything else be more important than what your body needs and how your heart feels?

What kind of life will the future versions of you have to live if you keep neglecting your mental, emotional and physical health by staying so disconnected from your body?

The power of being healthy

In a world that is constantly sick and disconnected, that uses addictions and quick fixes in the form of a tablet to survive, being truly healthy is a superpower.

In last week’s letter, we explored the link between power and responsibility.

If you do not take responsibility for your health, someone else will take on that responsibility (doctors, pharmaceutical industry), therefore they will also have the power to do what they want to do when it comes to your health and your body.

Sometimes this might be needed and not always a bad thing, but in a lot of cases, we rather swallow a tablet that will numb our bodies to the pain we are feeling instead of tuning into our bodies and listening to its actual needs.

There is a lot to unpack and learn when it comes to your mental, physical and emotional health.

From the wisdom that lies in your cycle (if you are a woman) to knowing how to nurture and fuel your body through nutritious food.

From getting to know and learning to meet your needs to exploring different ways your body loves to move.

From learning to understand the powerful messages that lie behind each of your emotions to discovering what moves your soul.

Here is how you can start to get to know your body:

1. Observe

There is no change without awareness.

You cannot change what you are not aware of, so you need to start observing yourself.

What is the first thing I do when I wake up?

• How does my body feel first thing in the morning?
• Do I eat or skip breakfast?
• What kind of food do I put in my body?
• How do I feel physically and emotionally after spending time with X?
• Do I listen to my body when it tells me that it is tired or do I spend 1 more hour scrolling on social media instead of going to sleep?

It might be helpful to get yourself a notebook and report the observations you made about your habits and emotions.

Take the time to question how these daily actions impact your body.

2. Educate yourself

Learning does not have to stop after you graduate.

You should expose yourself to new knowledge every single day.

(this is a topic for another letter, you are just going to have to trust me on this one)

Listen to podcasts or YouTube videos or start picking up books related to the feminine cycle, nutrition, how to process your emotions, sleep quality, stress management etc.

There is an infinite amount of knowledge and perspectives out in the world and it is all available to you on the same phone you spend hours scrolling on Instagram.

If you want to make your body and health your priority, you need to start choosing education and knowledge over mindlessly giving your attention away to a world that doesn’t even exist.

I will be sharing my favorite books, podcasts and articles with you as soon as I open the access to the Modern Health Community.

3. Act and learn to listen

Observation and knowledge won’t serve you if you do not decide to act.

The good thing is that through the awareness you gained from observing yourself and the knowledge you learned from all that new content you have been consuming, change will happen very naturally.

It will be way harder for you to enjoy your burger from McDonalds like you used to once you know where the meat comes from and how all these unnatural ingredients they put in your burger impact your body.

No matter how disconnected you have been from your body, it is still communicating with you.

Now it is time to create space for the feedback your body is giving you every day.

Once you hear your body speaking to you, act in your body’s best interest.

• If you can feel that you are tired, have some rest.
• If you can feel that you are hungry, eat some nutritious food.
• If your body doesn’t digest a certain ingredient well, stop consuming it.
• If your body wants to move, go for a walk or add some movement to your day.
• If you feel any uncomfortable emotion coming up, sit with it and release it.

This will invite your body to start trusting you because, instead of running away like you used to, you are finally here with your body.

4. Commit

You are now deepening your relationship with your body.

It is time to commit to making your body and your health your most important priority in life.

You won’t be able to choose your body all the time, but try to choose your body most of the time.

As you learn to embrace being a physical human who has a beautiful, capable and healthy physical body, you will discover the beauty and the immense power that lies in living a life built around mental, emotional and physical health.

Living in a healthy body sets you up for the best, most responsible and most powerful life ahead.

It will also make you an exception in a world full of sick and disconnected people.

That is where you gain the leverage to make a positive impact all around you.

But most importantly, that’s how you turn your body into your most loyal and loving companion.

Take care of you, and of your body ;)

I will see you in next week's letter.

Oli